Do you remember when Facebook became a ‘thing’? Unlike kids today, social media was not introduced until I was a young adult. I had just graduated and a highschool buddy traveling over seas msn’d me and asked if I’d heard of Facebook? I signed up and it became a way to stay connected to old friends, family who lived across the country and a way to share my own experiences. Since then the use of Social media has exploded. Facebook is estimated to have 1.69 BILLION users by the end of 2020 and Instagram has been holding steady at around 1 billion users to date. That is a lot of people.
There are still some folks who have decided to never jump on that band wagon… or jump on then bail off shortly afterward. A few friends – including my husband— choose to limit their engagement in it or don’t use it at all – which I kind of respect and admire. However, that is not the case for most.
With that said, the more I used FB and Insta, the more I became transfixed in mindless, numbing activity–including scrolling without engaging and diving into rabbit holes of continued clicking on articles I didn’t even find interesting > And after chatting with others about this… I realized I was not alone.
Far worse, I found the sheer volume of media consumption, negative content and argumentative, judgey comments I was absorbing, were affecting me in a negative way. Not to mention, even with the negativity, I found myself clicking on fb or Instagram, when I intended to grab my phone to check my email or put on a song. It was interrupting my daily life… It sounds so bizarre to type that… like how can these apps cause so much interruption? I am a bit ashamed of how numb and mindless I became to clicking and scrolling. My kids started to notice it. Urging me to “get off your phone mom.” I know I am not alone in this, but it is kind of a hard thing to admit… and honestly, I can’t help but wonder all the things I may have missed or would miss from my kids childhood, if I kept going the way I was.
I had been thinking of doing a “social media detox” for about a year… that is how long it took for me to finally put thought to action. I planned 2 weeks away from facebook and Instagram (the only platforms I engage in). That two weeks extended to 3 and is easing into 4. I started to reintroduce social media into my life, but like any detox, I am choosing what works for me and what doesn’t as I ease back in.
“Online profiles are not real. They do not define or encompass the wholeness of a human being. I think when we try to present ourselves online to highlight only the parts of us we are proud of, or in a way that depicts the ‘perfect’ image, we become less present in the life that matters – Our Real Life”
Kristine Macmillan
Key Insights
- It was easier to stay away from social media then I had originally thought.
- The first week I found myself grabbing my phone several times a day to scroll… by week two, the number of times I caught myself doing it reduced dramatically.
- I stopped taking photos ‘just to post’ and started taking photos just for me
- When on social media, I was constantly thinking… ooh this would be a good experience to post about… OR… Look how great my ‘gluten free’ cookies turned out—better take a photo. It took me about two weeks to stop thinking this way… and just start enjoying the moment for what it was—I still took pictures but was more present and in the moment while taking them.
- Creating a plan helped me stay on track and accountable
- So in that year of contemplating this detox I came up with a set of strategies… this seems silly, but I seriously believe we are becoming addicted to social media and like any abstinence from an addictive behaviour, a plan is required. Click here to check out my plan… and incorporate it into your own detox.
- I was more productive at home
- I realized I used social media as a procrastination tool… and I freaking love to procrastinate… so when the laundry was high and the dishes were dirty… I’d say “fuck it, what’s Joe Schmoe up to on Instagram today”. My life became less cluttered and more organized.
- I was more productive at work
- I was less distracted, completed my to do lists in a more timely fashion and found time to work on person goals that I had been procrastinating on.
- My mental health improved
- As someone who struggles with anxiety, I found my anxiety levels decreased significantly during this time. I also was very aware of how I felt as I slowly reintroduced some social media engagement… and I definitely feel higher levels of anxiety correlated with this reintroduction. In my plan I discuss unfollowing/ deleting/ hiding certain people or groups that may create a negative reaction.
- I was more engaged with my kids
- Instead of wondering if the activities I was doing with my kids were ‘insta worthy,’ I found myself being more fully present, more fully engaged and consequently had way more fun while doing activities with my kids.
- I was more present
- Overall, I was more present in my ‘REAL’ life. Online profiles are not real. They do not define and encompass the wholeness of a human being, and I think when we try to present ourselves online to highlight only the parts of us we are proud of, or only in a way that depicts the ‘perfect’ image, we become less present in the life that matters… Our real life, with real humans that we can see and interact with. I feel closer to my family and closer and more present with the people in my life and COVID bubble.
- Social Media is sometimes necessary
- During my detox I quickly realized certain extracurricular groups I am connected in mainly communicate via social media groups and pages. For example, my kids are part of a BMX’ing group that requires sign up for practice on Facebook. This meant I had to remember my password, sign in on my laptop and jump on facebook to do this. So… Flexibility is required…
- It is easy to cheat
- Like many people we use social media for our business, so I made sure to keep our business profile on my phone to monitor it or update posts. This also meant I had access to it… in all honesty, now and then I found myself scrolling… but due to the nature of our business, my husband had mostly started following architecture posts and Truck posts… so I now know a bit more about cool designs and Ford Broncos.
- Self Awareness is Key
- Okay… Social media is not the devil. There are many positive things that have come from social media (connection, online support groups, remembering those who have died, group learning pages, free business marketing and so on). How we use it and how it affects us is key. Stay aware. How do you feel before and after using a social media platform? Stay curious.
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